Gripped By Inertia

Ugh I am feeling a bit panicky here. I am looking at my dirty house and thinking I only have two and a half days to clean this thing before blast off. Not to mention packing and printing list thingies and putting dinner reservation numbers in my phone. Whoa....gotta breathe here. Gotta find my zen. What have I done today, well first I slept in because my insomnia decided to keep me up late and my sleep meds didn't kick in until oh 1:30 AM. So after I rolled out of bed and looked at the pile of dishes in the kitchen and the disarray that is my domicile I sighed and got back in bed. Sometimes I set these really high expectations for myself and then I start to freak when I can't complete them on my insane time frame. So I shove them under the carpet where no one will notice that giant lump accumulating. Then the panic begins to build because my magic shield which is my bedspread starts to wear thin and the panic starts seeping in.
So I get out of bed and look frightfully at all the things I have to do and get a little more panicky. So I sit down in front of my laptop to try to at least regain some normalcy here and begin to check email and blog a bit. When pondering on subjects to blog the obvious rose to the top which is my current state of anxiety. I think maybe I need to take one of those meds my nice Dr. gave me that I save for special occasions like panic attacks. If anyone out there has ever had the pleasure of having a panic attack they know that it is not a picnic. It is awful for you and the carnage that any innocent by standers in my instance endure can be bad. I can get mean sometimes and not mean it. Ugh the joy of anxiety problems. This is the very thing that makes me re-think becoming a mother. How am I going to handle it when my child turns two and I have to do several things in one day and they throw a tantrum and I have a panic attack?
How in the ham sandwich am I going to handle all of this! OK, OK this is not helpful. One day at a time, one minute at a time, stay in the now. Phew.
Great gravy. I am not doing to well here. OK need to delegate and prioritize.
Sorry that my mental ramblings have puddled on my blog but sometimes I just gotta get this stuff out of my head. I am hoping that my readers are not looking at this post in horror thinking about butterfly nets and straight jackets for everyone. I don't usually get this odd, it just happens prior to a big event such as long vacation that requires planning.
I am going to eat a nice lunch take my meds, make a list and start eating this elephant one bite at a time.

I need a Pre Vacation Vacation

Oh so much to do. Is there anyone else out there that hates having a little too much prep time before a big event.

You start off with a flurry of activity, lists, lists about planning, lists about packing, lists of lists about the planning and packing. Then you get a bunch of stuff. Then for me it is always around the week or two prior mark that I get kind of bleh with it all. The next thing I know it is three days prior to leaving holy crap! I have things to do and see and pack and buy and clean and water and pet and and and and and.....

Yet I knew this time was going to come three months ago. Here it is three days before take off and I have eight gagillion things to do. I should probably be cleaning a bathroom or hauling suitcases down. Am I, no, I am blogging about procrastination. So I am even sort of procrastinating procrastination. Wow was that even a sentence? I don't know. Ugh, it seems some times that we get so worked up prior to a big vacation and drive our selves practically to drink that by the time it starts you are exhausted. I am really trying to fight that urge.

I promise to not worry about packing everything I own. I promise not to let my sister worry me in to packing everything she owns and I own. I promise that I will delegate things to do. I promise I will let my husband help me so I don't get overwhelmed trying to do everything.

Auto Body, My Achin' Body and Mickey

Who knew I had a knack for auto body? The chipped off paint and minor damage to the front end of my new old car was bothering me. So I googled paint repair and read away. Off to Advanced Auto Parts for paint, clear coat, primer and sand paper. (Oooh sounds like I really know what I am talking about) After much cussing yesterday and sanding and aggravating the muscles in my lower back I am almost done. I have to say for a first try it doesn't look half bad. The beautiful part about it is, I know how to screw it up and I know how to do it correctly! So if I get the urge I can re do the parts that aren't as pretty as the ones I did well on.
Something else I wanted to touch on, is if you are going to buy a used car insist on getting the Carfax report. I got mine after the fact and discovered a recall on my car. I knew I wasn't driving a Lexus off the lot so I wasn't surprised at a few bugs here and there. I discovered that the turn signal has tourrettes syndrome. It would click at the oddest times, and would continue clicking long after turning off. Then it died all together. When I looked up the recall on my handy dandy carfax report low and behold, the recall was for the turn signal/hazard light assembly. Dun dun duuuuun! I called chevy gave them my vin and voila the robot lady told me that there was an open recall on my car. I took it to the dealership and got a once over the entire car and I got the problem solved for..... NOTHING. Goose egg, zero, nada, zip, zilch, nothing, absosmurfly no money. WOO HOO! Thank you Carfax!
On to other news, I hate my lower back.
(Just for those of you thinking you are smarty pants my back was bothering me before I turned into auto body girl so that was not the cause.)
Wouldn't you know the week before I head off to Disney it decides that "I am not happy and I am going to let you know it.". It is sending these mind-numbingly painful bursts of pain straight up my spine. When does this happen, whenever it wants to. I could be picking up a dish from the table, unlocking my car, petting my dog, turning around to walk through the kitchen, climbing a rock wall, you know the usual. So off to my Dr. who applauded me on my weight loss so far and the exercising. He sent me off with some meds for my poor back.
Let me tell you this troops, I don't care if I am on one of those carts that beep when you back up. I am going to Disney. Oh yes, I am going to Disney if I have to put one of those old ass AaAOOOoooga horns on a wheelchair and motor myself around Disney it is happening! NOTHING short of a hurricane will keep me from my mouse induced bliss.
So I have to "try" to take it easy on my back while I get ready for a week long trip. (HAH)