T Minus 15 Days and Counting..Tick....Tick...Tiiick

I am growing another person inside of me, and they want OUT. I mean push my enormous canoe feet against your tummy forty bajillion times a minute OOOuuuTTAHhh. I am amazed, enthralled and terrified all at once. I mere person here am creating a whole other person that I, me, myself and my husband will be RESPONSIBLE for. Like for food...and shelter and....for psychological well being! Aaaaaaaaaaaaa((run around room screaming into other room and back)) aaaaaaack!
I mean I do not want to be the subject of "how my mother ruined my life" visit number 342 to therapist. I want my child to look back all misty eyed about how we used to make chocolatey chip cookies on cold rainy afternoons and I was the bestus Mommy ever! (Waking back up from hormonal coma)
I am full of conflicting emotions...one minute I want this gymnast/monkey/drummer/baby thing out of me...the next moment I want him to stay put because he is safe in there and no one can hurt his little baby feelings. Besides I know the different ways he can come out...and they all involve pain.
Physically I feel like someone has sucked every morsel of energy from my body. I have to psych myself up to go cook dinner, do laundry, go to the grocery store, clean the kitchen, and go pee for the forty billionth time.
Amazingly through out the other 38 weeks of this pregnancy I have not had any significant back pain. I have suffered from it in the past and fully expected to have a LOT of issues with it. I should have knocked on an entire forest somewhere. Week 38 has arrived and so has the pain. It now wakes me up at night and hits mid afternoon and sometimesdrives me to lie in bed. It is when this strikes that the "Get him ooooooout of meeeee!" starts to rear its head. Then the fear of him actually coming out of me returns and I rub my belly and say "stay put for a while".
That and I panic-ordered some nursing bras day before yesterday. To my alarm I was reading in a book how it is not unusual during engorgement to swell to three to four times your normal breast size. On a good day I can give Dolly Parton and Pam Anderson a run for their money. I have a feeling after engorgement I am going to look like a flipping Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade float or one of those balloons with the rubber strings on the end that you punch over and over. So I ordered big bigger HOLY CRAP THE HUMANITY! sized nursing bras. One of them has cups so huge I can wear them as a little house on the prairie hat. I..am...not..kidding...at..all. If I have to throw Robbie out a window during a fire I can tie my bra to him and use it as a parachute so he can float safely to earth. I am telling you people this is circus freak huge scary....this baby better breast feed like a champ.
Now I am fully appreciating the "Martyr Mommy" speech of "I carried you around on swollen ankles for 9 months...blah blah blah...".

Things that Suck and Things that Don't

Ahhh nothing like the feel of a sinus/migraine headache to welcome in the first day of spring!
Yes today has been a fun filled festival of tissue, pills, cold fans and a dark room. Those fellow sinus and migraine sufferers know exactly what I am screaming....er.....whispering right now.

The dueling scales are still out of sync...what EVER at this point. I will be the eternal optimistic-pessimist and go with the higher numbers (they are probably right). My higher scale is giving me 318, 318, and 318 consistently. Even after the pity-pizza party I had last night (oops probably shouldn't have told you that) I lost instead of gained-I think, damn scales.

On to good news, I got my eagerly awaited package from Catherines via UPS. I was brave enough to get out the measuring tape and measure my awesome boobage. According to the the tape I am smaller-hooray yahoo yippee woo hoo! To explain my exuberance at the smaller size my bra size has done nothing but escalate since 1999 to actually see smaller digits is a thing of wonder. I have gone from 50 poke your eye out DDD to 48 DDD. Yes this is a small victory but damn it, I am going to prance like a pony for my small victory. After discovering my newly smaller boobage this called for a celebration of sorts, ordering new bras, primarily because they were buy one get one half price.

I have to say the Playtex 18 Hour Bra with the Comfort Fit strap is the best for over those of us who are extra blessed upon our chestses. They actually put your breasts in the proper position. Which by the way is not looking at your shoes. The straps have this gel in them that keep them from digging into your shoulders. If you measure properly you can breath in them and they don't bind and leave your back itching. If you are wondering where to get it www.catherines.com or www.playtexfits.com. I prefer Catherines because they are always running great sales.

The next happy hooray announcement is that I ordered a camisole for my anniversary. When I got married two years ago I bought a 30/32 camisole and it fit and it was pretty and all. This year I have ordered a 26/28. It is pretty it looks good I don't resemble a blue sausage with rubber bands wrapped around it. I also ordered a T-shirt in a similar style I had previously ordered in 5x in a 3x. This is huge the 3x is a 24/26, guess what, IT FIT!

I need to give a little history on why I am so elated at the slightly smaller sizes. Most of my adult life I have done nothing but get bigger and bigger and bigger. Back in 1997 I actually went down about three sizes and that was the biggest accomplishment I had. Since then I have gone from a misses size 14 to a super sized-plus size 32 and I was pushing that 32 to it's limit last October. I dare say I might have crept in to a 34 just didn't purchase any. It has been has been a tough struggle to get from 32 to 24/26/28 (depending at what store you are at).
For anyone else who is struggling and has fallen down only to trip and fall again, just keep going. It is worth it. Perhaps I need to tattoo that backward onto my own forehead so I don't forget it.